Why Does It Hurt To Give it Up, Let it Go, or Step Back?
My Story
Remember the old Nextel cell phone. It was more like a walkie talkie than a cell phone, but I felt like somebody when I had one clipped to my belt. Then came the flip phones- my favorite of which was the Motorola Razr. I think I had 3 of them and I wasn’t pressed about getting a newer phone. It was sleek, pretty, and one of the coolest phones of the time. Eventually Motorola stopped supporting it and I was forced to upgrade.
The Trap: I Can’t Go Back
What I noticed, though is it’s hard to go back. Every time I break my phone, I’m content to stay with the same model. I’m not a very picky person concerning most things. Right now, I have a Samsung Galaxy Note 9 and the Galaxy Note 20 is out. But once I get that new version, it’s difficult to go back. Can you imagine having to press the #3 three times to text the letter “F?” Or how about, actually flipping it open, to answer a call?
I can’t imagine not being able to talk, text, read my emails, and surf the internet all on the same phone, all during the same conversation. It’s painful to lose an app I’m used to. Sometimes after a system update, an app disappears off my home screen. It doesn’t immediately stand out which app disappeared, but there’s a blank spot on my home screen so something important is missing– after all it was on my home screen. So, I have a hissy fit. Did you get that? I don’t know which one is missing, but I have a hissy fit anyway.
I’m addicted to technology that I’m used to (cell phones, internet service, speed of internet service, apps, etc). It’s irritating when something goes wrong. Could you go back to the flip phone (assuming you aren’t still using one (smile)?
It Gets Worse
This transcends into all areas of our life and there are consequences. When it comes to money, the two things people pushback on most is going on a budget and spending less money. It’s hard to have stuff and then go back to not having it. Whether it’s giving up or cutting back on:
> Hairdos
> Netflix
> Amazon Prime
> Amazon Music
> Sirius XM
> OnStar
> Gym memberships
> Play Station Network
> Frequently eating out
> Cell phones and plans
> Internet service packages
Whatever it is, once we are used to having it, it hurts to go back. We’ve lived all our lives without these things. One day, we decide we wanted something on that list, and we went ahead and got it. Suddenly, this want became a need- in our own minds.
We Actually Can Go Back
Step back from bi-weekly hair-dos to maybe every six weeks; or step back from movie subscriptions in exchange for a good book, long walk, or family game night; or use your own body for resistance and aerobic exercise versus gym memberships.
You know money is tight; you’re living check to check or worse yet “Check to Monday.” You think it’s because you don’t make enough money, but I can almost guarantee that’s not the reason. In most cases, experience reveals, the problem is overspending.
What Else Can You Do?
Track your spending for the last 60- 90 days. You’ll find your money. You’ll find a whole lot more than that, too. It’s quite eye-opening. I know, I’ve done it myself. In fact, I did it for a full year. I found thousands of dollars that I could have paid towards building a six-month emergency fund, paid towards my student loan, started a business, or invested. But there was very little to show for it. Most of it was devoured in food, snacks, and entertainment. Most of the cash withdrawals, I couldn’t track at all.
If you want to make progress, do something different. Don’t be scared to look at your past. It will fuel your future actions- especially if you use it as an opportunity to learn and grow. Ask:
> How much money did you spend on wants vs. needs?
> Where did you throw away the most money?
> What patterns do you see?
> Were there events that preceded your spending sprees?
> How did you feel when you bought that item? …and that item? … and that item?
> What can you do differently, and do you really want to?
> What things can you let go of and can you forgo the pain until you’re in a better position?
The Good News
You see, it doesn’t have to be forever. Yes, budgeting is a forever thing. But with discipline and commitment, you may be out of a debt in a matter of a couple years. Can you imagine, getting paid and not owing anything but reoccurring bills like insurance, utilities, and cell phone service? Can you imagine having an entire paycheck left over each month or almost two checks? It’s freeing and you can do it.
Think about the above questions and more. Stay connected to helpful resources and buddy up with people on a similar journey. You’ll improve your chances of success.
